Category: Kidz & Teens
FFF Volume 7 Trailer
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A quick look at what's on tap in the new Found Footage Festival show, coming soon to your city.
Caught In The Web: Staying Safe In Cyberspace
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This safety video uses the latest cyber effects from 1998 to tell the dramatic story of a man overrun by cyberpunks, cyber viruses, and cyber predators, and the cyber detective who makes cyberspace cyber-safe again.
Disney World: One Kid’s Opinion
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We taped this show off Madison cable access TV in 1992 and have been quoting it ever since. There's a lot to admire about the 12-year-old host, Mark: his catty dismissal of Captain EO, his strict adherence to the five...
One Effed Up Christmas
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Here's an excerpt from a feature length film called "Santa And The Ice Cream Bunny." You would think this is a long lost Kenneth Anger film, but no. This is for kids. Some seriously effed up kids.
Get Around Santa
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A shoddily animated rapping Santa Claus tells us how Santa travels when he's not in his sleigh. Namely, in a jet ski, a Corvette and a backhoe.
What Does Santa Do?
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In this clip, we learn that in the off-season, Santa uses a hair dryer on his beard, shovels his own driveway and watches all the "There Goes a Firetruck" tapes we always find at thrift stores.
I Gotta Go!
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We find a lot of potty training videos at thrift stores, but "I Gotta Go!" might be the catchiest one of all time. Plus, there's a chimp at the end.
Let’s Have Fun At The Slush Puppy Factory
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This shameless promotional video for Slush Puppie plays less like a fun children's program and more like a drug-addled nightmare. Hosted by a wisecracking dog named Axle Power.
Dance Workout With Barbie
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This 1992 exercise video by Mattel makes the bizarre choice of featuring a stop-motion animated Barbie, which gives the whole thing a creepy, "Clash of the Titans" vibe. Featured on the Found Footage Festival Volume 3...
Religious Medley
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These four different but equally disturbing religious videos try to get you to believe in Christ via clowns, karaoke, puppets, and ventriloquism. Worked for us. Featuring: "Clown Ministry," "Little Marcy," "Christian ...
A Girl’s World
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This 1998 educational video proved that girls could do anything they wanted to do, including having extremely stilted conversations with female pilots.
You Gotta Believe
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In this New York Mets video, baseball great Mookie Wilson sings a song about believing in yourself. Inexplicably, it features football, cigarettes, and scientists.
Me Potty Wotty
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From the people who brought you the ultra-catchy "I Gotta Go!" comes this Caribbean-influenced potty training ditty, complete with crude animation.
Cheerleading Makes School Fun
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CMSF is quite possibly the most ambitious public access show ever. Host Jim W. Hawkins has recorded over 500 episodes over the last 10 years. Who knew there was that much cheerleading news to cover?
The Real Chad Allen
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In this insider peek into the real life of former teen heartthrob Chad Allen, the "Our House" star talks about his interests, making sure to stress that girls are on that list. Another fine entry in the "Corey Haim: M...
Thriller Dancer
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From "Stairway to Stardom," the greatest public access show in the history of television, this dance routine by Lola Perazzo is nothing short of stunning. The leotard could have left more to the imagination, but every...
Astronauts Poop
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Jack-of-all-trades/professional genie Hard Hat Harry leads our two precocious co-hosts on a tour of NASA and also teaches that, indeed, everybody poops. But astronauts seem to poop the most.
This Video Is About Herpes!
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This 1996 sex education video for teens tries so hard to be hip and edgy that it ends up being more irritating than the disease it's warning you about.
There Goes A…
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Among the most common videos we find in thrift stores are tapes in the "There Goes A..." series for kids, hosted by Dave and Becky. After watching this promo, how could you not want to buy these videos?
Stranger Danger, Part 2
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In this installment of "Stranger Danger," we learn never to pose for pictures for strangers, even if the stranger is a smooth-talking pizza commercial producer who promises to put you on TV.
Stranger Danger, Part 1
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This 1994 safety video teaches kids about the danger of talking to strangers. Tip #1: Don't use "cat" as a code word.
ABC Fun Fit With Mary Lou Retton
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This 1985 exercise video for kids is hosted by America's pluckiest Olympian, Mary Lou Retton. Maybe a little too plucky.
Alphabet Soup
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In this video, found at a Salvation Army in Passaic, NJ, a couple of tolerant Weimeraner dogs are humiliated in the interest of teaching kids the alphabet. Seems like a small price to pay.
Snow Monsters The Movie!
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This skiing safety video teaches kids that all they really need to be safe on the slopes is a little magic from a talking albino tiger.
